In 2012 my whole life changed. My dad caught a murder charge and was sentenced to 35 years plus in prison.He was my biggest role model in my life, I was Daddy’s little girl. My life was impacted; my kids’liveswere impacted by their pap going to prison. It took a huge toll on my husband and my relationship. We both started using meth. I was trying to make the thought of never having Daddy around go away, using drugs to hide my depression and emotions. My girls were 2 1/2 and 1 at the end of 2012. I found out I was pregnant again but it didn’t seem to click in my brain to stop using, until March 2013. I was ready but my husband wasn’t. April 21, 2013 my life forever changed and took a huge downfall. My husband and I went our own ways; things got extremely bad between the two of us. The kids and I left Oklahoma with the clothes on our back and moved back to Arkansas. I was clean. I was giving my 2 girls the life they needed and deserved. August 2013 my son was born. With all the stress of his health problems and being in Children’s the first month of this life all I knew to do was start using. It slowly started all over again except this time I started raising my sister’s two kids. Five kids by myself, no help, no answers all because of addiction. My sister was fighting herself. I was telling myself I would never turn out like my sister but honestly it was slowly happening. My drug habit got worse. I was hiding the fact I was using, so I thought. I was slowing losing control of my life. I wasn’t cleaning the house like I should. I let it get out from under me. I started leaving my 5 children with my cousin and his girlfriend who was a regular offender. All I was thinking about was getting high to cover up my stress and emotions. Father’s Day 2015 I lost everything all over a high. It was 11:53 p.m. DHS knocked on my door. I refused a drug test, I was pregnant, my house was a mess. My kids were taken into custody. I went crazy and went to a hospital for 5 days not knowing if my kids were ok, not knowing who had them, not knowing if they were together. I got out and found out my oldest daughter and son were with family but my 4 year old was alone, separated from the rest at a shelter. I thought I was ready but the only way I knew to deal with my emotions was to get high. Instead of getting clean I used more and more each day. I refused drug test for DHS. All of my kids ended up together with my oldest family. It took my 5 year old asking me “Mommy, when are you going to get better and not be “sick” anymore so we can be a family again” for me to open my eyes and stop using. I had it in my mind I was ready. I called DHS and asked for help. I went to rehab for a week. It was September 2, 2015 when things took a turn for the best. I got accepted and moved into Bethlehem House clean and sober. I got a job, did everything I was court ordered to do and finally received medical for myself and unborn child. I started saving money. Bethlehem House and DHS saved me. Within 4 months I got full custody of my kids back and October 20, 2015 they moved in with me. I had my son in January 2016. Bethlehem House has helped and blessed me so much. The encouragement to keep pushing and the “family” I needed. Since I have been here I’ve saved over $900, got custody of my kids back and regained the love and support from my family and friends. I’m currently trying to find a job since the birth of my son. I have become more into God, attending church more, reading the bible more and just praying!! Bethlehem House has been such a blessing to me and my 4 babies. Six months clean and sober.